My One, My Only, Political Post for Election 2012

Sometimes on Facebook I post "benefits of having a two year old."  Well, I have discovered yet another one:

The Human Political Call Answering Machine

George is very much into answering the phone.  The other day, the phone was ringing, and I could hear the computer voice saying "call from Washington, DC, call from Washington, DC."  This is normally when I jump up, and chat with my dear friend, Mitt Romney.

On this particular day, I just didn't have the energy.  "He's going to have to get through this on his own," I thought, "I have no more ideas for answers to debate questions, or lines for speeches."

So, I decided to ignore the call.  Well, George does not ignore calls.  EVER.  He ran over, and grabbed the phone.

George: "Hello!  This is ME!"

(I'll mention here, that in addition to being "very much into answering the phone," he is also "very much into himself."  He assumes that everyone who calls is calling to talk to him.  Probably because everyone who calls DOES talk to him--trying to somehow get an adult on the phone...)

George's face went from "happy and excited" to "confused and slightly annoyed" (the same way we all feel when we answer the phone and realize it is a political message).

The "person" on the other end did not enthusiastically say, "Hi George!" or ask him how he was doing (answer: "I'm two!").  He didn't even ask if he could speak to George's mommy or daddy.

Instead, the "person" launched into a whole bunch of words and did not stop talking.

Despite his confusion, George continued to listen patiently.  At one point, he looked at me and said, matter-of-factly,  "Only three dollars, Mommy." (Only three dollars?!?  Either some politician is getting desperate, or George mis-heard $30--or $300, for that matter)

The recording ended, and George handed me the phone.  "Here, Mommy, it's for you."

Thanks, George, I'll happily take it from here.

I Know You'll Be Pinning This

Do you suffer from insomnia?  Have you been looking for something to do while you are supposed to be sleeping, yet aren't?

Well, look no further!  We have discovered a fabulous activity you can do to keep yourself diverted from the fact that you aren't sleeping...even though you are supposed to be.  Sleeping that is.

And the best part is that you can do this using items you may already have around your house!

Step 1.  Find a long, sturdy implement.  Like a bat or a large stick.  If you have neither of these handy, do the following:  Remove the mattress from your bed frame.  If you are lucky, you will find wooden slats that the mattress rests on.  Grasp one of the slats firmly and pull.  Don't be afraid to pull hard.  Sometimes the slats are bolted in, and you may have to work at it.  But eventually it should break free.

Step 2.  Look around the room you are in--at the walls in particular.  Is there art hanging on the walls?  Basically, you are looking for something that is at least partially made of glass (like a photo frame), or other ceramic material.  In this case, we chose the antique china plates hanging on the wall above the guest bed.

(Note: these are not the plates we used, but are hanging in the same room as those we used.  

If we'd had a ladder, they would have been our next choice, I'm sure.

Step 3.  Now comes the fun.  Once you have your stick, or bed frame slat (as the case may be) and have selected the art on the wall you wish to use for your project, you are set to go.

Take the slat and knock the art off the walls.  It doesn't matter if you don't manage to break the art as you are knocking it off, because you will have time for that in the last step.  Just get it off the walls and onto a sturdy surface--the ground, or even a firm mattress works well (what we used).

Note: the antique plates were a nice choice for this project because they came off the wall easily.

Step 4.  Now that the plates (or art of choice) are off the wall, here is your chance to really go at it.  Take your slat and just beat the crud out of everything you knocked off the wall.  If you are doing it correctly, the plates (or picture frame, or whatever you chose), will break into many, many pieces.

There you have it!

I hope the experience is as rewarding for you as it was for George--I mean, us.  It was really fun to see the whole project come full circle like this--starting with me, going from antique shop to antique shop, painstakingly collecting plates one or two at a time.  Then ever so carefully arranging them on the wall to look "just right."  Followed by having them hang on the wall for a few years, and then, finally, when the time was right, having them broken into a bunch of shards.